After my presentation of my Odyssey, I was asked many questions.
· Why the song “Sympathy” from the Goo Goo Dolls?
o So why do I like Sympathy? Because people are always apologizing to me for how I was raised. It doesn’t make sense to me because they are always so nice and they didn’t do anything to me.
o And like many of their other songs before and since, this one kicks ass! I LOVE PUNK!
· Have you ever confronted my mother?
o No. What’s the point? I’m no shrink. But I have gone to school for many years. Psychology was one of my favorite studies. One of the things I learned was that my mother is crazy. She will never understand what she did to her children unless intensive therapy is involved. I already know that I will be in some form of therapy for the rest of my life.
· You were around drugs all of your life. Do you use any?
o No. I actually have a very messed up nervous system. Maybe due to all the beatings/trips of falling/getting kicked down stairs. Most drugs have a severe profound affect on me so unless I am in severe pain (I I’m a chronic pain suffer-er) I don’t take anything stronger than ibuprofen. And I’m allergic to marijuana. It makes me sneeze like crazy. Go figure.
· You are obese now. Any correlation to how you were raised?
o Yes. I weigh 260 lbs and am 5’4”. I have recently lost 40 lbs and am still working on a healthier lifestyle. Food was one of my early loves. Food was around when love was around. And love wasn’t around all of that much. Now my husband and children are around all the time.
· You have a very vibrant personality. How can you be so happy?
o Since I didn’t have a very good role model for acceptable behaviors or social standards there is not a moment (or second) that goes by that I don’t stop and think “Did I just offend someone?” or “Were my actions socially correct?”
o At the same time, I thrive on the happiness of people around me. I love my friends and they are what makes my family complete.
o I also have one hell of a temper. ( My husband is absolutely amazing when I am angry…and very brave) If I get mad I have to be very careful. I don’t in any way want to turn into my mother and hurt anyone and that becomes a very probable possibility when I get angry. If I stop talking, please don’t ask or engage me in conversation. I am trying to protect you from me until I get somewhere where I can blow off steam. If I start crying, leave the area immediately.
· You have 5 kids. What parenting model do you follow?
o I believe that all children are “tabula rasa” or blank slates at birth. This is before ideas such as political parties or race or religion is even a concern for them. It’s us, the bigger and “smarter” people that tell kids who what where and why they are different and what they are to do about it. And most times we should. However, in doing so sometimes we accidentally ( or even intently) take away the one thing that all babies know the very moment they are born: LOVE and acceptance.
o I want kids to get into my world and me into theirs. I don’t know what happened before they met me or what they will see and hear afterwards. But for that brief moment. I want them to know that love and kindness and compassion exist in this world and that all good things are possible.
o My husband and I co-sleep. I still breastfeed WKD who is 2 ½. I hug my 16 year old son every day. Even if his friends are around (they usually want a hug too). I practice baby-wearing when my back lets me. Otherwise WyrdHubby carries WKD on his shoulders. We are very involved parents and have a very hands-on parenting attitude.
· What about stranger danger and pedophiles?
o If I find one I’ll rip his/her throat out.
· Anything else?
o I am who I am. I am not here to please anyone. I make no excuses because I already do my best not to hurt those around me. Life is too short. When I do, I apologize and make amends. If you still don’t like that, please see the following message…